When replying to routine replies and positive messages what 4 goals should writers focus on?

When replying to routine replies and positive messages what 4 goals should writers focus on?

Excellence in Business Comm., 10e (Thill)

Chapter 8 Writing Routine and Positive Messages

1) When making a routine request, you should begin with

A) an indication of the importance of your request.

B) a statement of who you are.

C) a clear statement of the main idea or request.

D) a question.

E) a humorous comment.

Answer: C

2) When making a routine request, you should

A) use the inductive plan.

B) assume that the audience will comply.

C) demand immediate action.

D) explain the consequences of failing to comply.

E) assume that the audience will not comply.

Answer: B

3) Which of the following would be the best opening for a routine request?

A) Please send me a summary of last month's east region sales data.

B) As soon as you get this, send me last month's sales data.

C) I know you may not want to, but send me last month's sales data.

D) I am very sorry to ask you to do this.

E) Hopefully, this will not be too much trouble for you.

Answer: A

4) In the body of a routine request, you should

A) beg the reader to grant your request.

B) explain and justify your request.

C) give your sales pitch.

D) explain what will happen if the audience does not do what you are asking.

E) state your main idea.

Answer: B

5) When asking multiple questions in a request message

A) begin with the least important question and work your way up to the most important.

B) avoid any open-ended questions.

C) begin with the most important question.

D) weave your questions into the rest of the content of your message.

E) combine as many questions as possible into one.

Answer: C

1

Copyright © 2013 Pearson Education, Inc. publishing as Prentice Hall

Preview text

7 Writing Routine and Positive Messages L ea r n i n g O b jec tiv es After studying this chapter, you will be able to ❶ Outline an effective strategy for writing routine business requests.

Ti ps f or Success

❷ Describe three common types of routine requests.

“When we write at work, it is often about action . . . . Most ­people appreciate it when you tell them directly what you want, how it affects them, and why it is important to do it. At the same time, . . . we also have to build or maintain a positive relationship with the reader. A positive impression will help you get the action you want.”

❸ Outline an effective strategy for writing routine replies and positive messages. ❹ Describe six common types of routine replies and positive messages.

Ernst & Young is one of the world’s largest providers of professional services, with offices in 670 locations in 140 countries. Ernst & Young Canada operates in 14 ­Canadian cities, offering accounting, business, and financial consulting services to a variety of industries. As a managing partner, Fred Withers communicates widely with professional staff and clients. “Some people think that accountants only work with numbers,” says Withers, “but the key is being able to explain them to people in a clear, professional manner.” Whether requesting information from clients or responding to routine inquiries, Withers believes concise, accurate, and open communication can create a positive impression for the business.1 Much of your daily business communication will involve routine and positive messages, including routine requests for information or action, replies on routine business matters, and positive messages such as good-news announcements and goodwill messages, from product operation hints and technical support to refunds and ordering glitches. These messages are the focus of this chapter.

Strategy for Routine Requests Making requests is a routine part of business. In most cases, your audience will be prepared to comply, as long as you’re not being unreasonable or asking people to do work they would expect you to do yourself. By applying a clear strategy and tailoring your approach to each situation, you’ll be able to generate effective requests quickly. Like all other business messages, routine requests have three parts: an opening, a body, and a close. Using the direct approach, open with your main idea, which is a clear statement of your request. Use the body to give details and justify your request, then close by requesting specific action.

—Fred G. Withers, Managing Partner, Ernst & Young

Learning Objective ❶ Outline an effective strategy for writing routine business requests.

For routine requests and positive messages,

• State the request or main idea • Give necessary details • Close with a cordial request for specific action

[150] P ART 3: B R IEF B US INE S S M E S S AGE S

Stating Your Request Up Front Begin routine requests by placing your initial request first; up front is where it stands out and gets the most attention. Of course, getting right to the point should not be interpreted as licence to be abrupt or tactless: Take care that your direct approach doesn’t come across as abrupt or tactless.

• Pay attention to tone. Instead of demanding action (“Send me the latest version of the budget spreadsheet.”), soften your request with words such as please and I would appreciate. • Assume that your audience will comply. You can generally make the assumption that your audience members will comply when they clearly understand the reason for your request. This attitude helps you write in a positive tone. • Be specific. State precisely what you want. For example, if you request the latest market data from your research department, be sure to say whether you want a 1-page summary or 100 pages of raw data.

Explaining and Justifying Your Request Use the body of your message to explain your request. Make the explanation a smooth and logical continuation of your opening remarks. If complying with the request could benefit the reader, be sure to mention that. If you have multiple requests or questions, consider these tips: If you have Several techniques multiplewill requests help you or establish anstart questions, audience-centred with the most tone. important one.

• Ask the most important questions first. If cost is your main concern, you might begin with a question such as “How much will it cost to have our new website created by an outside firm?” Then you may want to ask more specific but related questions, such as whether discounts are available for paying early. • Deal with only one topic per question. If you have an unusual or complex request, break it down into specific, individual questions so that the reader can address each one separately. This consideration not only shows respect for your audience’s time but also gets you a more accurate answer in less time.

Requesting Specific Action in a Courteous Close Close request messages with

• A request for some specific action • Information about how you can be reached

• An expression of appreciation Learning Objective Describe three common types of routine requests.

Close your message with three important elements: (1) a specific request that includes any relevant deadlines, (2) information about how you can be reached (if it isn’t obvious), and (3) an expression of appreciation or goodwill. For example: “Please send the figures by April 5 so that I can return first-quarter results to you before the April 15 board meeting. I appreciate your help.” Concluding your message with “Thank you” or “Thanks for your help” is fine, but “Thank you in advance” is considered a bit stuffy and presumptuous.

Common Examples of Routine Requests The most common types of routine messages are asking for information or action, making claims, and requesting adjustments.

Asking for Information or Action When you need to know about something, elicit an opinion from someone, or request a simple action, you usually need only ask. In essence, simple requests say:

• What you want to know or what you want readers to do. • Why you’re making the request. • Why it may be in your readers’ interest to help you (if applicable).

c h a pter 7: W r i ti n g R o u ti n e a n d Po si ti ve M essa g es [ 151]

FIGURE 7.1

Effective Message Requesting Action To: From:

Identifies the subject of the email

[email protected]

Subject:

Your Input for Competitive Threat Analysis

Attached:

C:\Strategic planning\Competitive Analysis template.doc;

Hello everyone,

Acknowledges that responding to the request will require some work, but the result will benefit everyone

At last week’s off-site meeting, Charles asked me to coordinate our companywide competitive threat analysis project. In order to devise a comprehensive strategic response that is sensitive to local market variations, we need your individual insights and advice.

Gets right to the point of the message

To minimize the effort for you and to ensure consistent data collection across all regions, I’ve attached a template that identifies all the key questions we’d like to have answered. I realize this will require several hours of work on your part, but the result will be a truly nationwide look at our competitive situation. From this information, we can create a plan for next fiscal year that makes the best use of finite resources while adapting to your local district needs.

Explains the benefit of responding to the request

To allow sufficient time to compile your inputs before the November 13 board meeting, please email your responses to me by November 8. Thanks for your help on this important project. Helene Helene H. Clausen Director, Strategic Initiatives Early Education Solutions, Inc. 14445 Lawson Blvd, Suite 455 Don Mills, ON M3B 2x2 tel: 416-555-1200 fax: 416-555-1210 www.early-ed.ca

Provides a clear and meaningful deadline, then closes in a courteous manner

Pointers for Making a Routine Request • Your readers will respond favourably, so be direct. • Use a polite, personal tone and don’t demand a response. • Justify the request or explain its importance. • Explain the benefits of responding. • Close courteously, with a request for specific action.

For simple requests, a straightforward request gets the job done with a minimum of fuss. In more complex situations, you may need to provide more extensive reasons and justification for your request. Naturally, be sure to adapt your request to your audience and the situation (see Figure 7.1).

Routine requests can be handled with simple, straightforward messages, but more complicated requests can require additional justification and explanation.

Asking for Recommendations The need to inquire about people arises often in business. For example, before extending credit or awarding contracts, jobs, promotions, or scholarships, companies often ask applicants to supply references. Companies ask applicants to list references who can vouch for their ability, skills, integrity, character, and fitness for the job. Before you volunteer someone’s name as a reference, ask permission to do so. Some people don’t want you to use their names, perhaps because they don’t know enough about you to feel comfortable writing a letter or because they or their employers have a policy of not providing recommendations. Requests for recommendations and references are routine, so you can organize your inquiry using the direct approach. Open your message by clearly stating why the recommendation is required (if it’s not for a job, be sure to explain its purpose) and that you would like your reader to write the letter. If you haven’t had contact with the person for

Always ask for permission before using someone as a reference.

[152] P ART 3: B R IEF B US INE S S M E S S AGE S

FIGURE 7.2

Effective Request for a Recommendation

❶ Plan

Write

Complete

Analyze the Situation

Adapt to Your Audience

Revise the Message

Verify that the purpose is to request a recommendation letter from a college professor.

Show sensitivity to audience needs with a “you” attitude, politeness, positive emphasis, and bias-free language.

Evaluate content and review readability; avoid unnecessary details.

Gather Information

Compose the Message

Gather information on classes and dates to help the reader recall you and to clarify the position you seek.

Style is respectful and businesslike, while still using plain language and appropriate voice.

Simple letter format is all the design this message needs.

Select the Right Medium The letter format gives this message an appropriate level of formality, although many professors prefer to be contacted by email.

Produce the Message

Proofread the Message Review for errors in layout, spelling, and mechanics.

Distribute the Message Deliver the message via postal mail or email if you have the professor’s email address.

Organize the Information Messages like this are common and expected, so a direct approach is fine.

1181 Ashport Drive Don Mills, ON M3C 2Y8 March 14, 2016 Professor Linda Kenton School of Business Ryerson University 350 Victoria Street Toronto, ON M5B 2K3 Dear Professor Kenton: Request for Recommendation

Tucker includes information near the opening to refresh her professor’s memory.

I recently interviewed with Strategic Investments and have been called for a second interview for their Analyst Training Program (ATP). They have requested at least one recommendation from a professor, and I immediately thought of you. May I have a letter of recommendation from you? As you may recall, I took BUS 485, Financial Analysis, from you in the fall of 2014. I enjoyed the class and finished the term with an “A.” Your comments on financial ratio analysis impressed me beyond the scope of the actual course material. In fact, taking your course helped me decide on a future as a financial analyst. My enclosed résumé includes all my relevant work experience and volunteer activities. I would also like to add that I’ve handled the financial planning for our family since my father passed away several years ago. Although I initially learned by trial and error, I have increasingly applied my business training in deciding what stocks or bonds to trade. This experience has given me a practical edge over others who may be applying for the same job.

She provides a deadline for response and includes information about the person who is expecting the recommendation.

If possible, Ms. Blackmon in Human Resources needs to receive your letter by March 30. For your convenience, I’ve enclosed a preaddressed, stamped envelope. I would appreciate your time and effort in writing this letter of recommendation for me. I am looking forward to putting my education to work, and I’ll keep you informed of my progress. Thank you for your consideration. Sincerely,

Joanne Tucker Enclosure

The opening states the purpose of the letter and makes the request, assuming the reader will want to comply with the request.

The body refers to the enclosed résumé and mentions experience that could set the applicant apart from other candidates— information the professor could use in writing the recommendation. The close mentions the preaddressed, stamped envelope to encourage a timely response.

c h a pter 7: W r i ti n g R o u ti n e a n d Po si ti ve M essa g es [ 153]

some time, use the opening to trigger the reader’s memory Rea l - Time U pd ate s of the relationship you had, the dates of association, and Learn More by Reading This PDF any special events or accomplishments that might bring a clear and favourable picture of you to mind. The right way to ask for recommendations on LinkedIn Use the body of the request to list all the information the recipient would need to write the recommendation, Follow LinkedIn’s etiquette guide for students and recent including the full name and address or email address of the graduates to increase your response rate and to mainperson to whom the recommendation should be sent. tain positive networking connections. Go to http://realtimeupdates.com/bce6 and click on Learn More. If you are Consider including an updated résumé if you’ve had sigusing MyBCommLab, you can access Real-Time Updates nificant career advancement since your last contact. within Business Communication Resources. Close your message with an expression of appreciation. When asking for an immediate recommendation, you should also mention the deadline. If you are requesting a printed letter, always be sure to enclose a stamped, pre-addressed envelope as a conveRefresh the memory of any potential nience to the other party. Figure 7.2 provides an example of a request that follows these reference you haven’t been in touch with for a while. guidelines.

Making Claims and Requesting Adjustments If you’re dissatisfied with a company’s product or service, you can opt to make a claim (a formal complaint) or request an adjustment (a settlement of a claim). In either case, it’s important to maintain a professional tone in all your communication, no matter how angry or frustrated you are. Keeping your cool will help you get the situation resolved sooner. Open with a straightforward statement of the problem along with your request. In the body, give a complete, specific explanation of the details; provide any information the recipient would need to verify your complaint. In your close, politely request specific action or convey a sincere desire to find a solution. And, if appropriate, suggest that the business relationship will continue if the problem is solved satisfactorily. Back up your claim with invoices, sales receipts, cancelled cheques, dated correspondence, and any other relevant documents. Send copies and keep the originals for your files. If the remedy is obvious, tell your reader exactly what you expect from the company, such as exchanging incorrectly shipped merchandise for the right item or issuing a refund if the item is out of stock. In some cases, you might ask the recipient to resolve a problem. However, if you’re uncertain about the precise nature of the trouble, you could ask the company to make an assessment and then advise you on the remedy. Supply your contact information so that the company can discuss the situation with you, if necessary. Compare the ineffective and effective versions in Figure 7.3 for an example of making a claim.

Strategy for Routine Replies and Positive Messages Just as you’ll make numerous requests for information and action throughout your career, you’ll also respond to similar requests from other people. When you are responding positively to a request, sending routine announcements, or sending a positive or goodwill message, you have several goals: to communicate the information or the good news, answer all questions, provide all required details, and leave your reader with a good impression of you and your firm. Readers receiving routine replies and positive messages will generally be interested in what you have to say, so you’ll usually use the direct approach. Place your main idea (the positive reply or the good news) in the opening. Use the body to explain all the relevant details, and close cordially, perhaps highlighting a benefit to your reader.

In a claim letter,

• Explain the problem and give details

• Provide backup information • Request specific action Be prepared to document any claims you make with a company. Send copies and keep the original documents.

L e a r n i n g O b j e c ti v e ❸ Outline an effective strategy for writing routine replies and positive messages.

Use a direct approach for positive messages.

[154] P ART 3: B R IEF B US INE S S M E S S AGE S

FIGURE 7.3

Poor and Improved Versions of a Claim

r PoTo:o

[email protected]

CC: Subject: Request for Energy Cost Analysis We have been at our present location only three months, and we don’t understand why our December utility bill is $815.00 and our January bill is $817.50. Businesses on both sides of us, in offices just like ours, are paying only and average of $543.50 and $545.67 for the same months. We all have similar computer and office equipments, so something must be wrong. Small businesses are helpless against big utility companies. How can we prove that you read the meter wrong or that the November bill from before we even moved in here got added to out December bill? We want someone to check this meter right away. We can’t afford to pay these big bills. This is the first we’ve complained to you about anything, and I hope you’ll agree that we deserve a better deal. Sincerely,

Opens with emotions and details

Uses a defensive tone and blames the meter reader Closes with irrelevant information and a weak defence

Laura Covington Proprietor

d

e v o r p

Im

To: [email protected] CC: Subject: Request for Energy Cost Analysis

Provides details in the body so that the reader can understand why Covington thinks a problem exists

Requests specific action in the close and provides contact information to make responding easy

Dear Customer Service Representative: A comparison of our electricity bills with those of our neighbouring businesses suggests that the utility meter in our store may not be accurate. Please send a technician to check it. The European Connection opened at our current location on December 1, and we have received two monthly bills since then. In both instances the amount of our bill was nearly twice what neighbouring businesses in this building were charged, even though we all have similar storefronts and equipment. We paid $815.00 in December and $817.50 in January. In contrast, the highest bills that neighbouring businesses paid were $543.50 and $545.67 for those two months.

Opens by clearly and calmly stating the problem Presents details clearly, concisely, and completely

If your representative would visit our store, he or she could do an analysis of how much energy we are using. I understand that you regularly provide this helpful service to customers, and I would appreciate hearing from you this week. You can reach me by calling (805) 979-7727 during business hours. I look forward to hearing from you. Sincerely, Laura Covington Proprietor

Pointers for Making a Claim

• Establish rapport by praising some aspect of the product or explaining why you purchased it. • Present facts clearly, politely, and honestly. • Show confidence in the reader’s sense of fairness; avoid threats, sarcasm, hostility, or exaggeration. • Avoid any accusations that you cannot support with facts. • Close with a request for specific action.

c h apter 7: Writing R o utine an d Po siti v e M essages [ 155]

Starting with the Main Idea By opening with the main idea or good news, you prepare your audience for the details that follow. Make your opening clear and concise. Although the following introductory statements make the same point, one is cluttered with unnecessary information that buries the purpose, whereas the other is brief and to the point: Instead of I am pleased to inform you that after careful consideration of a diverse and talented pool of applicants, each of whom did a thorough job of analyzing Loblaw’s training needs, we have selected your bid.

With the direct approach, open with a clear and concise expression of the main idea or good news.

Write Loblaws has accepted your bid to provide public speaking and presentation training to the sales staff.

The best way to write a clear opening is to have a clear idea of what you want to say. Before you begin to write, ask yourself, “What is the single most important message I have for the audience?”

Providing Necessary Details and Explanation Use the body to explain your point completely so that your audience won’t be confused or doubtful about your meaning. As you provide the details, maintain the supportive tone established in the opening. This tone is easy to continue when your message is entirely positive, as in this example: Your educational background and internship have impressed us, and we believe you would be a valuable addition to Green Valley Properties. As discussed during your interview, your salary will be $4300 per month, plus benefits. In that regard, you will meet with our benefits manager, Paula Sanchez, at 8 a.m. on Monday, March 21. She will assist you with all the paperwork necessary to tailor our benefit package to your family’s needs. She will also arrange various orientation activities to help you acclimate to our company.

However, if your routine message is mixed and must convey mildly disappointing information, put the negative portion of your message into as favourable a context as possible: Instead of No, we no longer carry the Sportsgirl line of sweaters.

Try to embed any negative information in a positive context.

Write The new Olympic line has replaced the Sportsgirl sweaters that you asked about. Olympic features a wider range of colours and sizes and more contemporary styling.

The more complete description is less negative and emphasizes how the audience can benefit from the change. However, if the negative news is likely to be a shock or particularly unpleasant for the reader, you’ll want to use the indirect approach (discussed in Chapter 8).

Ending with a Courteous Close Your message is more likely to succeed if it leaves your readers with the feeling that you have their best interests in mind. You can accomplish this by highlighting a benefit to the audience or by expressing appreciation or goodwill. If follow-up action is required, clearly state who will do what next.

Common Examples of Routine Replies and Positive Messages Most routine and positive messages fall into six categories: answers to requests for information and action, grants of claims and requests for adjustment, routine informational messages, good-news announcements, goodwill messages, and procedures.

Make sure audience members understand what to do next and how that action will benefit them.

Learning Objective ❹ Describe six common types of routine replies and positive messages.

[156] P ART 3: B R IEF B US INE S S M E S S AGE S

FIGURE 7. 4

Effective IM Response to an Information Request

Answering Requests for Information or Action Every professional answers requests for information or action from time to time. If the response to a request is a simple “yes” or some other straightforward information, a direct approach is appropriate. A prompt, gracious, and thorough response will positively influence how people think about you and the organization you represent (see Figures 7.4 and 7.5).

Granting Claims and Requests for Adjustment Even the best-run companies make mistakes, from billing customers incorrectly to delivering products that fail to perform properly. In other cases, the customer or a third party might be responsible for the mistake, such as misusing a product or damaging it in shipment. Each of these events represents a turning point in your relationship with your customer. If you handle the situation well, your customer will likely be even more loyal than before because you’ve proven that you’re serious about customer satisfaction. However, if a customer believes that you mishandled a complaint, you’ll make the situation even worse. Dissatisfied customers often take their business elsewhere and are likely to tell numerous friends and colleagues about the negative experience. A transaction that might be worth only a few dollars by itself could cost you many times that amount in lost business. Consequently, view every mistake as an opportunity to improve a relationship. Your response to the complaint depends on both your company’s policies for resolving such issues and your assessment of whether the company, the customer, or some third party is at fault.

c h apter 7: Writing R o utine an d Po siti v e M essages [ 157]

FIGU RE 7.5

Personalized Reply to a Request To: Julian Zamakis

Uses typical email format

From:

Haley Middleton

CC: Subject: EMPLOYMENT INFORMATION Dear Mr. Zamakis:

Refers to previous correspondence Explains in the body how the company uses résumés that are kept on file Closes on a warm, positive note

Thank you for your interest in Herman Miller, Inc. Although we currently have no openings matching your qualifications, our needs are continually changing, and we would like to retain a copy of your resumé for one year. As a leading global manufacturer and marketer of quality furniture systems, products, and services, we are often in need of qualified candidates. When an opening does occur, we review our files to match our needs with candidates’ qualifications. We cultivate a working environment that is conducive to the creative process. Our corporate culture develops and rewards those who acquire new skills and take charge of their careers. Be sure to keep us posted with updates on your progress as you gain experience and skills. Please check back with us. Our website is continually updated with the most recent employment information. Just follow the links to investigate career opportunities, the variety of benefits we extend to our employees, and the corporate culture at Herman Miller.

States purpose immediately—that no positions are currently open—but buries the bad news midparagraph and balances it with the positive idea that a position may open up Gives reader a glimpse into the corporate culture and encourages Zamakis to keep in touch

Sincerely,

Includes plenty of contact information, in keeping with the friendly audience focus

Haley Middleton Human Resources Herman Miller [email protected] www.hermanmiller.ca 888-443-4357 (Canada and USA only) Writing at 9:16 A.M. on April 23, 2016

Pointers for Writing Positive Messages Initial Statement of the Good News or Main Idea • Respond promptly. • If message is mixed, present the good news first. • Avoid trite, obvious statements. • Convey an upbeat, courteous, you-oriented tone. Middle, Informational Section • Imply or express interest in the request. • Provide details of the good news. • List all information in an orderly manner. • If possible, answer all questions in the order posed. • Adapt replies to the reader’s needs. • Indicate what you have done and what you will do. • Remind reader of benefits of using your firm. Warm, Courteous Close • If further action is needed, tell the reader how to proceed and encourage the reader to act promptly. • Avoid clichés (such as “Please feel free to”). • Offer additional service. • Express goodwill, or look optimistically to the future.

Responding to a Claim When your Company is at Fault Before you respond

when your firm is at fault, make sure you know your company’s policies in such cases, which might include specific legal and financial steps to be taken. As a general approch, take the following steps:

• • • • • •

Acknowledge receipt of the customer’s claim or complaint. Sympathize with the customer’s inconvenience or frustration. Take (or assign) personal responsibility for setting matters straight. Explain precisely how you have resolved, or plan to resolve, the situation. Take steps to repair the relationship. Follow up to verify that your response was correct.

[158] P ART 3: B R IEF B US INE S S M E S S AGE S

In addition to these positive steps, maintain professional demeanour by avoiding some key negative steps as well: Don’t blame anyone in your organization by name, don’t make exaggerated apologies that sound insincere, don’t imply that the customer is at fault, and don’t promise more than you can deliver. Responding to a Claim When the Customer is at Fault Communication

When granting a claim when the customer is at fault, try to discourage future mistakes without insulting the customer.

about a claim is a delicate matter when the customer is clearly at fault. If you refuse the claim, you may lose your customer—as well as many of the customer’s friends and colleagues, who will hear only one side of the dispute. You must weigh the cost of making the adjustment against the cost of losing future business from one or more customers. Some companies have strict guidelines for responding to such claims, whereas others give individual employees and managers some leeway in making case-by-case decisions. If you choose to grant the claim, simply open with that good news. However, the body needs special attention because you need to discourage repeated mistakes without insulting the customer. Close in a courteous manner that expresses your appreciation for the customer’s business (see Figure 7.6). Responding to a Claim When a Third Party is at Fault Some claims are the

When a third party is at fault, your response depends on your company’s agreements with that organization.

result of a mistake by a third party, such as a credit card processing company or a delivery service. Your company may not have made the mistake, but the customer could ask you to resolve the matter anyway. Evaluate each situation carefully and know your company’s policies before responding. For instance, an online retailer and the companies that manufacture its merchandise might have an agreement specifying that the manufacturers automatically handle all complaints about product quality. However, regardless of who eventually resolves the problem, if customers contact you, you need to respond with messages that explain how the problem will be solved. Pointing fingers is both unproductive and unprofessional. Resolving the situation is the only issue customers care about.

Sharing Routine Information When writing informative messages,

• State the purpose at the beginning and briefly mention the nature of the information you are providing

• Provide the necessary details • End with a courteous close

Many messages involve sharing routine information, such as project updates and order status notifications. Use the opening to state the purpose of the message and briefly mention the nature of the information you are providing. Provide the necessary details and end with a courteous close. Most routine communications are neutral. That is, they stimulate neither a positive nor a negative response from readers. For example, when you send departmental meeting announcements and reminder notices, you’ll generally receive a neutral response from your readers (unless the purpose of the meeting is unwelcome). Simply present the factual information in the body of the message, and don’t worry too much about the reader’s attitude toward the information. Some routine informative messages may require additional care. For instance, policy statements or procedural changes may be good news for a company, perhaps because they are saving the company money. However, it may not be obvious to employees that such savings may make available additional employee resources or even pay raises. If the reader may not initially view the information positively, use the body of the message to highlight the potential benefits from the reader’s perspective.

Announcing Good News To develop and maintain good relationships, smart companies recognize that it’s good business to spread the word about positive developments. These developments can include opening new facilities, hiring a new executive, introducing new products or services, or sponsoring community events. Because good news is always welcome, use the direct approach. Good-news announcements are often communicated in a news release, also known as a press release, a specialized document used to share relevant information with the news

c h apter 7: Writing R o utine an d Po siti v e M essages [ 159]

FIGU RE 7.6

Responding to a Claim When the Customer Is at Fault

❶ Plan

Write

Complete

Analyze the Situation

Adapt to Your Audience

Revise the Message

Verify that the purpose is to grant the customer’s claim, tactfully educate him, and encourage further business.

Show sensitivity to audience needs with a “you” attitude, politeness, positive emphasis, and bias-free language.

Evaluate content and review readability; avoid unnecessary details.

Gather Information

Compose the Message

Gather information on product care, warranties, and resale information.

Style is respectful while still managing to educate the customer on product usage and maintenance.

Emphasize a clean, professional appearance.

Select the Right Medium An email message is appropriate in this case because the customer contacted the company via email.

Produce the Message

Proofread the Message Review for errors in layout, spelling, and mechanics.

Distribute the Message Email the reply.

Organize the Information You’re responding with a positive answer, so a direct approach is fine.

To: [email protected] CC: Subject: re: Warranty Repair? Dear Mr. Cox: Thank you for contacting us about your in-line skates. Even though your six-month warranty has expired, Skates Alive! is mailing you a complete wheel assembly replacement free of charge. The enclosed instructions will explain how to remove the damaged wheel line and install the new one.

Subtly promotes a more appropriate product for the customer

The “Fastrax” (model NL 562) you purchased is our best-selling and most reliable skate. However, wheel jams may occur when fine particles of sand block the smooth rotating action of the wheels. These skates perform best when used on roadways and tracks that are relatively free of sand. We suggest that you remove and clean the wheel assemblies once a month and have them checked by your dealer every six months. Because of your Vancouver location, you may want to consider our more advanced “Glisto” (model NL 988) when you decide to purchase new skates. Although more expensive than the Fastrax, the Glisto design helps shed sand and dirt quite efficiently and should provide years of carefree skating. Enjoy the attached PDF copy of “Rock & Roll,” our free skating newsletter.

Closes on a positive note that conveys an attitude of excellent customer service

We love hearing from our skaters, so keep in touch. All of us at Skates Alive! wish you good times and miles of healthy skating. Sincerely, Sukjit Amar Customer Service Representative

Acknowledges reader communication, keeps opening positive by avoiding words such as problem, and conveys the good news right away Explains the problem without blaming the customer by avoiding the pronoun you and by suggesting ways to avoid future problems Gives the reader a glimpse into the corporate culture and encourages continued correspondence

Pointers for Granting a Claim • Open with the good news. • Thank the reader for writing. • Explain how you’ll grant the claim. • Don’t argue with the reader’s version of events. • Keep your explanations objective, non-vindictive, and impersonal. • Apologize only when appropriate, and do so in a non-dramatic fashion. • Close by reminding the reader how you are honouring the claim. • Encourage a favourable view of your company and its products. • Clarify any remaining actions the reader must take.

media. (News releases are also used to announce negative news, such as plant closings.) In most companies, news releases are usually prepared or at least supervised by specially trained writers in the public relations department. The content follows the customary ­pattern for a positive message: good news followed by details and a positive close. However, traditional news releases have a critical difference: you’re not writing directly to the ultimate

[160] P ART 3: B R IEF B US INE S S M E S S AGE S

audience (such as the readers of a newspaper); you’re trying to interest an editor or a reporter in a story, and that person will then write the material that is eventually read by the larger audience. To write a successful news release, keep the following points in mind:2

• Above all else, make sure your information is newsworthy and relevant to the specific publications or websites to which you are sending it.

• Focus on one subject; don’t try to pack a single news release with multiple unrelated news items. Put your most important idea first. Don’t force editors to hunt for the news. Be brief; break up long sentences and keep paragraphs short. Eliminate clutter, such as redundancy and extraneous facts. Be as specific as possible. Minimize self-congratulatory adjectives and adverbs. If the content of your message is newsworthy, the media professionals will be interested in the news on its own merits. • Follow established industry conventions for style, punctuation, and format.

• • • • •

Companies can communicate directly with customers and others with news releases.

Until recently, news releases were crafted in a way to provide information to reporters who would then write their own articles if the subject matter was interesting to their readers. Thanks to the internet and social media, however, the nature of the news release is changing. Many companies now view it as a general-purpose tool for communicating directly with customers and other audiences, creating direct-to-consumer news releases. As media expert David Meerman Scott puts it, “Millions of people read press releases directly, unfiltered by the media. You need to be speaking directly to them.”3 The newest twist on news releases is the social media release, which has several advantages over the traditional release. First, the social media release emphasizes bulletpoint content that is blog- and Twitter-friendly, making it easy for enthusiasts and others to share key points. Second, as an electronic-only document (a specialized webpage, essentially), the social media release offers the ability to include videos and other multimedia elements. Third, social bookmarking buttons make it easy for people to help publicize the content.4 Figure 7.7 is an example of a social media news release.

Fostering Goodwill

Goodwill is the positive feeling that encourages people to maintain a business relationship.

Make sure your compliments are sincere and honest.

Taking note of significant events in someone’s personal life helps foster the business relationship.

An effective message of appreciation documents a person’s contributions.

All business messages should be written with an eye toward fostering positive relationships with audiences, but some messages are written specifically to build goodwill. You can use these messages to enhance your relationships with customers, colleagues, and other businesspeople by sending friendly, even unexpected, notes with no direct business purpose.The small effort to send a goodwill message can have a positive and lasting effect on the people around you. Effective goodwill messages must be sincere and honest. Otherwise, you’ll appear to be interested in personal gain rather than in benefiting customers, fellow workers, or your organization. To come across as sincere, avoid exaggerating and support compliments with specific evidence. In addition, readers often regard more restrained praise as being more sincere. Sending Congratulations One prime opportunity for sending goodwill messages is to congratulate individuals or companies for significant business achievements—perhaps for being promoted or for attaining product sales milestones (see Figure 7.8). Other reasons for sending congratulations include the highlights in people’s personal lives, such as weddings, births, graduations, and success in non-business competitions. You may congratulate business acquaintances on their own achievements or on the accomplishments of a spouse or child. You may also take note of personal events, even if you don’t know the reader well. If you’re already friendly with the reader, a more personal tone is appropriate. Sending Messages of Appreciation An important leadership quality is the a­ bility to recognize the contributions of employees, colleagues, suppliers, and other associates. Your praise does more than just make the person feel good; it encourages further excellence. A message of appreciation may also become an important part of someone’s personnel file. So when

c h a pter 7: W r i ti n g R o u ti n e a n d Po si ti ve M essa g es [ 161]

F IGU RE 7.7

Social Media News Release

Additional information is available through these other tabs. The high-level message is condensed to a single Twitter-friendly “sound bite.” Social media and email buttons make it easy for anyone to share this page.

The full narrative on the left is “bulletized” here on the right, which helps bloggers and others create their own story. Each bullet also has a Twitter button, which lets readers send the bullet point as an individual tweet.

A variety of product photos are available for download and social sharing. An embedded clip provides a video version of the news release.

The full-text version of the news release message is available for reading and easy sharing.

Related links take readers to the company’s main website or the specific product webpage.

Source: Copyright © 2012 by Noodles and Company. Reprinted with permission.

Instead of Words cannot express my appreciation for the great job you did. Thanks. No one could have done it better. You’re terrific! You’ve made the whole firm sit up and take notice, and we are ecstatic to have you working here.

Write Thanks again for taking charge of the meeting in my absence and doing such an excellent job. With just an hour’s notice, you pulled the legal and public relations departments together to present a united front in the negotiations. Your dedication and communication abilities have been noted and are truly appreciated.

you write a message of appreciation, try to specifically mention the person or people you want to praise, as in this example: Thank you and everyone on your team for the heroic efforts you took to bring our servers back up after last Friday’s flood. We were able to restore business right on schedule first thing Monday morning. You went far beyond the level of contractual service in restoring our data centre within 16 hours. The special contribution of networking specialist Julienne Marks, who worked for 12 straight hours to reconnect our internet service, was remarkable. If I can serve as a reference in your future sales activities, please let me know.

Real - Tim e Update s Learn More by Reading This Article Simple rules for writing effective thank-you notes These tips are easy to adapt to any business or social occasions in which you need to express appreciation. Go to http:// real-timeupdates.com/bce6 and click on Learn More. If you are using MyBCommLab, you can access ­Real-Time Updates within Business Communication Resources.

[162] P ART 3: B R IEF B US INE S S M E S S AGE S

FIGURE 7. 8

A Goodwill Message To: [email protected] CC: Subject: Congratulations on Your Financing

Opens with a positive and sincere expression of congratulations Reminds the recipient of their previous meeting and offers specific points about the recipient’s worthiness in a way that compliments without exaggerating Closes on an upbeat note that keeps the focus on the recipient

Hello Ben, I Just heard from Vivian Albers that you and your partners received full funding from San Marino Capital. Congratulations! Although we passed on your presentation earlier this year, I was convinced that your unique business model and solid management team were worthy of firstround financing from an investment group with the right mix of connections and experience. I've known Vivian and her colleagues at San Marino for more than twenty years, so I can speak from experience when I say you have joined forces with one of the best firms in the business. I wish you all the best as you move toward your initial product launch. Sincerely, Roger DeCairn DeCairn & Smythe (403) 555-2379 www.dsivestors.biz

Hearing a sincere thank you can do wonders for morale.5 Moreover, in today’s electronic media environment, a handwritten thank-you note can be a particularly welcome acknowledgment.6 Offering Condolences

The primary purpose of condolence messages is to let the audience know that you and the organization you represent care about the person’s loss.

Condolence letters are brief personal messages written to comfort someone after the death of a loved one. You may have occasion to offer condolences to employees or other business associates (when the person has lost a family member) or to the family of an employee or business associate (when that person has died). These messages can feel intimidating to write, but don’t let the difficulty of the task keep you from responding promptly. Timing and media choice are important considerations with condolence letters. The sooner your message is received, the more comforting it will be, so don’t delay. And unless circumstances absolutely leave you no choice, do not use electronic media. A brief, handwritten note on quality stationery is the way to go. Open a condolence message with a brief statement of sympathy, such as “I am deeply sorry to hear of your loss” in the event of a death, for example. In the body, mention the good qualities or the positive contributions made by the deceased. State what the person meant to you or your colleagues. In closing, you can offer your condolences and your best wishes. Here are a few general suggestions for writing condolence messages:

• Keep reminiscences brief. Recount a memory or an anecdote (even a humorous one) but don’t dwell on the details of the loss, lest you add to the reader’s sadness.

• Write in your own words. Write as if you were speaking privately to the person. Don’t quote “poetic” passages or use stilted or formal phrases. If the loss is a death, refer to it as such rather than as “passing away” or “departing.” • Be tactful. Mention your shock and dismay but remember that bereaved and distressed loved ones take little comfort in lines such as “Richard was too young to die.”

c h apter 7: Writing R o utine an d Po siti v e M essages [ 163]

• Take special care. Be sure to spell names correctly and to be accurate in your review of facts. Try to be prompt. • Write about special qualities of the deceased. You may have to rely on reputation to do this, but let the grieving person know you valued his or her loved one. • Consider mentioning special attributes or resources of the bereaved person. If you know that the bereaved person has attributes or resources that will be a comfort in the time of loss, such as personal resilience, religious faith, or a circle of close friends, mentioning these can make the reader feel more confident about handling the challenges he or she faces.7 The following is an example of condolences written by a supervisor to his administrative assistant after learning of the death of her husband: My sympathy to you and your children. All your friends at Carter Electric were so very sorry to learn of John’s death. Although I never had the opportunity to meet him, I do know how very special he was to you. Your tales of your family’s camping trips and his rafting expeditions were always memorable.

Condolence letters are the most personal business messages you may ever have to write, so they require the utmost in care and respect for your reader. By keeping the ­messages simple, short, and sincere, you will be able to achieve the right tone.

Writing Procedures Giving instructions in the workplace is a frequent routine task. Often you have to let ­clients or co-workers know how to perform an operation. Workplace instructions or procedures lay out the steps to perform the operation or task in an easy-to-follow sequence. Informal, written procedures often are sent in emails, memos, and letters. ­Longer, more detailed procedures that may be used by many people will be written in a separate document, put online or into a manual, or posted near where the procedures must be followed. Documenting procedures gives employees guidance in performing tasks and helps companies set performance standards. Examples of procedures include instructions on how to fill out forms, operate machines, follow guidelines for recycling, or carry out office tasks. Just like other communications you prepare, you can apply the three-step process to write an effective procedure. Planning In the planning stage, identify your purpose—to instruct the reader in how to do something. The reader will be using the document to perform the steps. Analyze the reader’s knowledge about the topic—how much or how little does the reader know and need to know? You may need to include definitions for beginners, or you may be able to skip basic information for readers with advanced knowledge. For example, if your procedures are for chartered accountants, you will not have to define basic terms, but if you are writing procedures for new hires with only one year of accounting experience, more background information may be required. Organize the steps in chronological order and begin with a general overview that includes:

• What the procedures are about (in general). • Any definition, background information, or specialized language used. • A preview of the main stages if the procedure is lengthy. The introductory information orients the reader to the document and provides a context for the details to follow. After the overview, list the steps. The procedure may conclude with the last step in the sequence, or it may conclude with troubleshooting suggestions. Figure 7.9 provides a WorkSafeBC sample procedure on how to lock out a piece of industrial equipment to ensure no one will turn on the equipment during maintenance.

[164] P ART 3: B R IEF B US INE S S M E S S AGE S

FIGURE 7.9

Sample Safe Work Procedure for Lockout

BASIC STEPS TO LOCK OUT

Overview defines and previews

Lockout is the use of locks to prevent machinery or equipment from being started up accidentally when maintenance work is being done. Follow these five basic steps to lock out machinery and equipment: 1. Identify the machinery or equipment that needs to be locked out.

Steps are in a numbered list

2. Shut off the machinery or equipment. Make sure that all moving parts come to a complete stop. Also ensure that the act of shutting off equipment does not cause a hazard to other workers. 3. Identify and de-activate the main energy-isolating device (such as a switch or valve) for each energy source. 4. Apply a personal lock to the energy-isolating device for each energy source, and ensure that all parts and attachments are secured to prevent inadvertent movement. Your personal locks are supplied by the superintendent.

Steps begin with verbs

Bold highlights warning Some steps include explanations

5. Ensure that all workers are in the clear and that no hazard will be created if the lockout is not effective. 6. Test the lockout to make sure that each energy source has been effectively locked out. Maintenance work can now begin.

Writing Readers will frequently not read the whole procedure before beginning, instead

choosing to consult the selected steps while performing the operation. So be sure to make your procedures easy to scan. Here are some tips on how to write effective instructions:

• • • •

Use short paragraphs for the overview. Put the steps into a list. Divide the tasks into a series of action statements. Begin each step with a command form verb. By beginning each step with a verb, you emphasize action. • Number the steps when a sequence must be followed. For instructions that do not have a set order, use bullets for the list instead of numbers. • Separate explanations from steps so they are easily distinguished. One way to separate them is to indent the explanations, thus distinguishing them in alignment from action statements (as is done here).

• Highlight warnings and precautions. • Use active voice and second person—talk directly to the reader. Ineffective Names and ID numbers are to be filled in on the form in the spaces provided, and the boxes below must be checked to verify your age and policy limit.

Effective 1. Fill in your name and ID number in the spaces provided. 2. Check the boxes to verify your age and

policy limit.

Completing Ask someone who is typical of the intended audience to use your instructions to complete the task. This will let you know if information is missing or unclear. Decide what needs emphasis. For example, if a warning is included, is it highlighted with boldface or set apart from the surrounding text? Use document design features such as text boxes, boldface, indentation, and white space to draw attention to key parts, especially for long procedures. For longer procedures, use headings to show the main organizational divisions. Break up long lists of steps by grouping related steps and providing subheadings. If you have provided headings, readers can more easily find the information they need.

LEARNING OBJECTIVES: Check Your Progress ❶ OBJECTIVE Outline an effective strategy for writ-

ing routine business requests. When writing a routine request, open by stating your specific request. In the body, justify your request and explain its importance. Close routine requests by asking for specific action (including a deadline, if appropriate) and expressing goodwill. A courteous close contains three important elements: (1) a specific request, (2) information about how you can be reached (if it isn’t obvious), and (3) an expression of appreciation or goodwill. ❷ OBJECTIVE Describe three common types of rou-

tine requests. The most common types of routine requests are asking for information or action, making claims, and requesting adjustments. Requests for information or action should explain what you want to know or what you want readers to do, why you’re making the request, and why it may be in your readers’ interest to help you (if applicable). To make a claim (a formal complaint about a product or service) or request an adjustment (a settlement of a claim), open with a straightforward statement of the problem, use the body to give a complete explanation of the situation, and close with a polite request to resolve the situation. ❸ OBJECTIVE Outline an effective strategy for writ-

ing routine replies and positive messages. The direct approach works well for routine replies and positive messages because recipients will

MyBCommLab®

g­ enerally be interested in what you have to say. Place your main idea (the positive reply or the good news) in the opening. Use the body to explain all the relevant details, and close cordially. ❹ OBJECTIVE Describe six common types of routine

replies and positive messages. Most routine and positive messages fall into six categories: answers to requests for information and action, grants of claims and requests for adjustment, informative messages, good-news announcements, goodwill messages, and procedures. Answering requests for information or action is a simple task, often assisted with form responses that can be ­customized as needed. Granting claims and requests for adjustments is more complicated, and the right response depends on whether the company, the customer, or a third party was at fault. Informative messages are often simple and straightforward, but some require extra care if the information affects recipients in a significant way. Good-news announcements are often handled by news releases, which used to be sent exclusively to members of the news media but are now usually made available to the public as well. Goodwill messages, meant to foster positive business relationships, include congratulations, thank-you messages, and messages of condolence. To make goodwill messages effective, make them honest, ­sincere, and factual. Procedures tell how to carry out workplace tasks. Including an overview and easy-toscan listed steps will assist the reader.

Go to MyBCommLab for everything you need to help you succeed in the job you’ve always wanted! Tools and resources include the following: • Writing Activities • Document Makeovers • Video Exercises • Grammar Exercises—and much more!

Practise Your Grammar Effective business communication starts with strong grammar skills. To improve your grammar skills, go to MyBCommLab, where you’ll find exercises and

­ iagnostic tests to help you produce clear, effective d communication.

[ 165]

[166 ] PAR T 3: B R IEF B US INE S S M E S S AGE S

Test Your Knowledge To review chapter content related to each question, refer to the indicated Learning Objective. 1. What are three guidelines for asking a series of questions in a routine request? L.O.❶ 2. Should you use the direct or indirect approach for most routine messages? Why? L.O.❷

3. If a message contains both positive and negative information, what is the best way to present the negative information? L.O.❸ 4. How can you avoid sounding insincere when writing a goodwill message? L.O.❹ 5. What are eight tips for writing procedures? L.O.❹

Apply Your Knowledge To review chapter content related to each question, refer to the indicated Learning Objective. 1. Every time you send a routine request to one of your co-workers, he fails to comply. His lack of response is beginning to affect your job performance. Should you send him an email message to ask what’s wrong? Complain to your supervisor about his uncooperative attitude? Arrange a face-toface meeting with him? Bring up the problem at the next staff meeting? Explain. L.O.❷

2. Your company’s error cost an important business customer a new client; you know it, and your customer knows it. Do you apologize, or do you refer to the incident in a positive light without admitting any responsibility? Briefly explain. L.O.❹ 3. You want to put out a news release about your company’s latest product. What advantages would you gain by making it a social media release? L.O.❹

Practise Your Skills Exercises fo r Perfecting Your Writing

To review chapter content related to each set of exercises, refer to the indicated Learning Objective. In some instances, supporting information will be found in another chapter, as indicated. Revising Messages: Direct Approach L.O.❶ Revise the following short email messages so that they are more direct and concise. Develop a subject line for each revised message. 1. I’m contacting you about your recent order for a High Country backpack. You didn’t tell us which backpack you wanted, and you know we make a lot of different ones. We have the canvas models with the plastic frames and vinyl trim, and we have the canvas models with leather trim, and we have the ones that have more pockets than the other ones. Plus they come in lots of different colours. Also they make the ones that are large for a big-boned person and the smaller versions for little women or kids. 2. Thank you for contacting us about the difficulty you had collecting your luggage at the Pearson airport. We are very sorry for the inconvenience this has

caused you. Travelling can create problems of this sort regardless of how careful the airline personnel might be. To receive compensation, please send us a detailed list of the items that you lost and complete the following questionnaire. You can email it back to us. 3. Sorry it took us so long to get back to you. We were flooded with résumés. Anyway, your résumé made the final 10, and after meeting three hours yesterday, we’ve decided we’d like to meet with you. What is your schedule like for next week? Can you come in for an interview on June 15 at 3:00 p.m.? Please get back to us by the end of this work week and let us know if you will be able to attend. As you can imagine, this is our busy season. Revising Messages: Direct Approach L.O.❶ Rewrite the following sentences so that they are direct and concise. 4. We wanted to invite you to our special 40 percent

off by-invitation-only sale. The sale is taking place on November 9. 5. We wanted to let you know that we are giving an iPod with every $100 donation you make to our radio station.

c h apter 7: Writing R o utine an d Po siti v e M essages [ 167]

6. The director planned to go to the meeting that will

be held on Monday at a little before 11:00 a.m. 7. In today’s meeting, we were happy to have the opportunity to welcome Paul Eccelson. He reviewed some of the newest types of order forms. If you have any questions about these new forms, feel free to call him at his office. Identifying Strategies: Teamwork L.O.❶, Chapter 2 With another student, conduct an audience analysis of the following message topic: a notice to all employees announcing that to avoid layoffs, the company will institute a 10 percent salary reduction for the next six months. 8. If the company is small and all employees work

in the same location, which medium would you ­recommend for communicating this message? 9. If the company is large and employees work in a variety of locations around the world, which medium would you recommend for communicating this message? 10. How is the audience likely to respond to this message? 11. Based on this audience analysis, would you use the direct or the indirect approach for this message? Explain your reasoning. Revising Messages: Closing Paragraphs L.O.❶ Rewrite each of the following closing paragraphs to be concise, courteous, and specific. 2. I need your response sometime soon so I can order 1 the parts in time for your service appointment. Otherwise your air-conditioning system may not be in tip-top condition for the start of the summer season. 13. Thank you in advance for sending me as much information as you can about your products. I look forward to receiving your package in the very near future. 14. To schedule an appointment with one of our knowledgeable mortgage specialists in your area, you can always call our hotline at 1-800-555-8765. This is also the number to call if you have more questions about mortgage rates, closing procedures, or any other aspect of the mortgage process. Remember, we’re here to make the home-buying experience as painless as possible. Acti vities

Each activity is labelled according to the primary skill or skills you will need to use. To review relevant chapter content, you can refer to the indicated Learning Objective. In some instances, supporting information will be found in another chapter, as indicated. 1. Message Strategies: Making Routine Requests; Completing: Evaluating Content, Organization, and Tone L.O.❷, Chapter 5 Analyze the strengths

and weaknesses of this message and then revise it so that it follows this chapter’s guidelines for routine requests for information: I’m fed up with the mistakes that our current accounting firm makes. I run a small construction company, and I don’t have time to doublecheck every bookkeeping entry and call the accountants a dozen times when they won’t return my messages. Please explain how your firm would do a better job than my current accountants. You have a good reputation among homebuilders, but before I consider hiring you to take over my accounting, I need to know that you care about quality work and good customer service.

2. Message Strategies: Making Routine Requests; Completing: Evaluating Content, Organization, and Tone L.O.❷, Chapter 5 Analyze the strengths and weaknesses of this message and then revise it so that it follows this chapter’s guidelines for routine requests for information:

I’m contacting you about your recent email request for technical support on your cable internet service. Part of the problem we have in tech support is trying to figure out exactly what each customer’s specific problem is so that we can troubleshoot quickly and get you back in business as quickly as possible. You may have noticed that in the online support request form, there are a number of fields to enter your type of computer, operating ­system, memory, and so on. While you did tell us you were experiencing slow download speeds during certain times of the day, you didn’t tell us which times specifically, nor did you complete all the fields telling us about your computer. Please return to our support website and resubmit your request, being sure to provide all the necessary information; then we’ll be able to help you.

3. Message Strategies: Writing Routine Replies; Completing: Evaluating Content, Organization, and Tone L.O.❹, Chapter 5 Analyze the strengths and weaknesses of this message and then revise it so that it follows this chapter’s guidelines for responding to requests for adjustments:

[168 ] PAR T 3: B R IEF B US INE S S M E S S AGE S

We read your letter, requesting your deposit refund. We couldn’t figure out why you hadn’t received it, so we talked to our maintenance engineer, as you suggested. He said you had left one of the doors off the hinges in your apartment in order to get a large sofa through the door. He also confirmed that you had paid him $5.00 to replace the door since you had to turn in the U-Haul trailer and were in a big hurry. This entire situation really was caused by a lack of communication between our housekeeping inspector and the maintenance engineer. All we knew was that the door was off the hinges when it was inspected by Sally Tarnley. You know that our policy states that if anything is wrong with the apartment, we keep the deposit. We had no way of knowing that George just hadn’t gotten around to replacing the door. But we have good news. We approved the deposit refund, which will be mailed to you

from our home office in Red Deer, Alberta. I’m not sure how long that will take, however. If you don’t receive the cheque by the end of next month, give me a call. Next time, it’s really a good idea to stay with your apartment until it’s inspected, as stipulated in your lease agreement. That way, you’ll be sure to receive your refund when you expect it. Hope you have a good summer.

4. Message Strategies: Writing Positive Messages; Media Skills: Microblogging L.O.❹, Chapter 6 Locate an online announcement for a new product that you find interesting or useful. Read enough about the product to be able to describe it to someone else in your own words and then write four Twitter tweets: one to introduce the product to your followers and three follow-up tweets that describe three particularly compelling features or benefits of the product.

Cases Apply the three-step writing process to the following cases, as assigned by your instructor. 1. Message Strategies: Requesting a Recommendation L.O.❷

Assume you have completed your educational program and have landed an interview with an employer who has asked you to supply a letter of recommendation from one of your professors or past employers. You are quite excited about the job prospect and carefully consider who to ask for the letter. Be prepared to explain why you are asking this particular person and summarize three or four of your strengths that you could include in your request. Choose a professor or employer who knows your work and who you think would be a strong reference. Make up any details you need and write the letter. ❚ Text Messaging Skills

2. Message Strategies: Writing Positive Messages

L.O.❹

You are an assistant manager in a fine restaurant in Toronto and have accompanied your boss to the Vancouver International Wine Festival, a premier event in the wine industry. More than 711 wines and 197 wineries from 14 countries are represented at this year’s festival. Trade professionals and collectors join thousands from the general public to taste new products. Your boss is hoping to select several wineries to feature at the restaurant and the two of

you have split up to find specific varietals of particular interest to the restaurant. He is checking out wines from the Alsace and you are concentrating on Pinots—over 160 different Pinots are being poured at the show! You have discovered one that you believe to be exceptional value, but there is not much stock of it. You want to be sure your boss gets to it in time before it’s gone. You’ve picked up quite a bit of buzz about the wine from the people standing around the booth, and no wonder. It tastes like a much more expensive wine than it is. You have noted the price ($35 per bottle), the quantity available (4 cases), the shipping times to Toronto (two months), the Wine Spectator ratings the 2012 vintage scored (92), the winery representative’s name (Zara), and the booth number (276 in the Main Hall). Your Task Compose a text message to your boss alerting him about the wine and asking him to meet you at the booth. Keep in mind that your text messaging service limits messages to 160 characters, including spaces and punctuation.8 ❚ Email Skills

3. Message Strategies: Making Routine Requests L.O.❷

You head up the corporate marketing department for a nationwide chain of clothing stores. The company has decided to launch a new store-within-a-store concept,

c h a pter 7: W r i ti n g R o u ti n e a n d Po s i t i ve M essa g es [ 169]

in which a small section of each store will showcase “business casual” clothing. To ensure a successful launch of this new strategy, you want to get input from the best retailing minds in the company. You also know it’s important to get regional insights from around the country, because a merchandising strategy that works in one area might not succeed in another. Your Task Write an email message to all 87 store

managers, asking them to each nominate one person to serve on an advisory team (managers can nominate themselves if they are local market experts). Explain that you want to find people with at least five years of retailing experience, a good understanding of the local business climate, and thorough knowledge of the local retail competition. In addition, the best candidates will be good team players who are comfortable collaborating long distance, using virtual meeting technologies. Also, explain that while you are asking each of the 87 stores to nominate someone, the team will be limited to no more than eight people. You’ve met many of the store managers, but not all of them, so be sure to introduce yourself at the beginning of the message. ❚ Letter Writing Skills

4. Message Strategies: Making Routine Requests L.O.❷

As a consumer, you’ve probably bought something that didn’t work right or paid for a service that didn’t turn out the way you expected. Maybe it was a pair of jeans with a rip in a seam that you didn’t find until you got home or a watch that broke a week after you bought it. Or maybe your family hired a lawn service to do some yard work, and no one from the company showed up on the day promised. When the crew finally appeared, they did not do what they’d been hired for but did other things that wound up damaging valuable plants. In any of these situations, you’d be wise to write a claim letter asking for a refund, repair, replacement, or other adjustment. You’d need to include all the details of the transaction, plus your contact address and phone number. Your Task To practise writing claim letters, choose

an experience like this from your own background or make up details for these imaginary situations. If your experience is real, you might want to mail the letter. The reply you receive will provide a good test of your claim-writing skills. ❚ Podcasting Skills

5. Message Strategies: Writing Routine Messages L.O.❹, Chapter 6

As a training specialist in the human resources department at Rocky Mountain Cycles, you’re always on the lookout for new ways to help employees learn vital job skills. While watching a production worker page through

a training manual, learning how to assemble a new bike, you get what seems to be a great idea: record the assembly instructions as audio files that workers can listen to while performing the necessary steps. With audio instructions, they wouldn’t need to keep shifting their eyes between the product and the manual—and constantly losing their place. They could focus on the product and listen for each instruction. Plus, the new system wouldn’t cost much at all; any computer can record the audio files, and you’d simply make them available on an intranet site for download onto iPods or other digital music players. Your Task You immediately run your new idea past

your boss, who has heard about podcasting but isn’t sure it is appropriate for business training. He asks you to prove the viability of the idea by recording a demonstration. Choose a process that you engage in ­yourself— anything from replacing the strings on a guitar to sewing a quilt to changing the oil in a car—and write a brief (one page or less) description of the process that could be recorded as an audio file. Think carefully about the limitations of the audio format as a replacement for printed text (for instance, do you need to tell people to pause the audio while they perform each task?). If your instructor directs, record your podcast and submit the audio file. ❚ Email Skills ❚ Team Skills

6. Message Strategies: Writing Routine Replies; Collaboration: Team Projects L.O.❹, Chapter 2

You are director of customer services at Highway Bytes, which markets a series of small, handlebar-mounted computers for bicyclists. These Cycle Computers do many things, from computing speed and distance travelled to displaying street maps with voice-controlled GPS navigation. Serious cyclists love them, and your company is growing so fast that you can’t keep up with all the customer service requests you receive every day. Your boss wants to not only speed up response time but also reduce staffing costs. She also wants to allow your technical experts the time they need to focus on the most difficult and important questions. You’ve just been reading about automated response systems, and you quickly review a few articles before discussing the options with your boss. Artificial intelligence researchers have been working for decades to design systems that can actually converse with customers, ask questions, and respond to requests. Some of today’s systems have vocabularies of thousands of words and the ability to understand simple sentences. For example, chatterbots are automated bots that can mimic human conversation, to a degree. Unfortunately, even though chatterbots hold a lot of promise, human communication is so complex that

[170 ] PAR T 3: B R IEF B US INE S S M E S S AGE S

a truly automated customer service agent could take years to perfect (and may even prove to be impossible). ­However, the simplest automated systems, called autoresponders, are fast and extremely inexpensive. They have no built-in intelligence, so they do nothing more than send back the same reply to every message they receive. You explain to your boss that although some of the messages you receive require the attention of your product specialists, many are simply requests for straightforward information. In fact, the customer ­service staff already answers some 70 percent of email queries with three ready-made attachments: • Installing Your Cycle Computer. Gives customers advice on installing the cycle computer the first time or reinstalling it on a new bike. In most cases, the computer and wheel sensor bolt directly to the bike without modification, but certain bikes require extra work. • Troubleshooting Your Cycle Computer. Provides a step-by-step guide to figuring out what might be wrong with a malfunctioning cycle computer. Most problems are simple, such as dead batteries or loose wires, but others are beyond the capabilities of your typical customer. • Upgrading the Software in Your Cycle ­Computer. Tells customers how to attach the cycle computer to their computer and download new software from Highway Bytes. Your boss is enthusiastic when you explain that you can program your current email system to look for specific words in incoming messages and then respond, based on what it finds. For example, if a customer message contains the word installation, you can program the system to reply with the Installing Your Cycle Computer attachment. This reconfigured system should be able to handle a sizable portion of the hundreds of emails your customer service group gets every month. Your Task With a team assigned by your instructor, first compile a list of key words that you’ll want your email system to look for. You’ll need to be creative and spend some time with a thesaurus. Identify all the words and word combinations that could identify a message pertaining to one of the three subject areas. For instance, the word attach would probably indicate a need for the installation material, whereas new software would most likely suggest a need for the upgrade attachment. Second, draft three short email messages to accompany each ready-made attachment, explaining that the attached document answers the most common questions on a particular subject (installation, troubleshooting, or upgrading). Your messages should invite

recipients to write back if the attached document doesn’t solve the problem, and don’t forget to provide the email address: [email protected] Third, draft a fourth message to be sent out whenever your new system is unable to figure out what the customer is asking for. Simply thank the customer for writing and explain that the query will be passed on to a customer service specialist who will respond shortly. ❚ Blogging Skills

7. Message Strategies: Writing Positive Messages L.O.❹, Chapter 2

You are normally an easygoing manager who gives your employees a lot of leeway in using their own personal communication styles. However, the weekly staff meeting this morning pushed you over the edge. People were interrupting one another, asking questions that had already been answered, sending text messages during presentations, and exhibiting just about every other poor listening habit imaginable. Your Task Review the advice in Chapter 2 on good

listening skills, then write a post for the internal company blog. Emphasize the importance of effective listening and list at least five steps your employees can take to become better listeners. ❚ Blogging Skills ❚ Portfolio Builder

8. Message Strategies: Writing Positive Messages L.O.❹

Mountain Equipment Co-op (MEC) has become known as one of the greenest companies in Canada, adopting a variety of technologies and practices that have reduced its energy usage greatly. Your Task Write a one- or two-paragraph post for an internal blog for MEC, letting employees know how well the company is doing in its efforts to reduce energy usage and thanking employees for the energy-saving ideas they’ve submitted and the individual efforts they have made to reduce, reuse, and recycle. Learn more about the company’s accomplishments by reading their “Sustainability” material at www.mec.ca.9 ❚ Procedure Writing Skills

9. Message Strategies: Revising a Procedure L.O.❹

Revise the poorly written procedure below. Use the guidelines given in the chapter to identify problems in planning, style, and design, and then reorganize and rewrite the procedures using effective document design. Buy More Industries is an electronics retail operation with a full-time staff of 40 and a part-time staff of 80. The employees are between the ages of 18 and 40. Incorporate these procedures into an email message to all employees from the general manager.

c h apter 7: Writing R o utine an d Po siti v e M essages [ 171]

Evacuations It is important that all personnel are in compliance with Buy More Industries’ Evacuation Procedures in the event of an emergency. An Emergency Team is responsible for shutting down the building but there are some procedures for general staff too. It is imperative that the building be exited and that the staff be congregated with their fellow department staff members in the designated area. The gathering area can be found outside the building by the Pay Station in Parking Lot A. It is advisable that doors must be shut when leaving the area. When the emergency alarm is sounded all staff are to follow the commands of the Emergency Team who have had emergency preparedness training and who will take charge of the removal of all customers from the store. It is incumbent upon all staff to lock any registers and display cabinets that are beside them when the alarm goes off but it is not expected that staff would put themselves in danger to stay in the area or return to the area when the alarm is sounding to go back in to lock up. Don’t be alarmed. Panic adds to the problem and is not helpful. It is imperative that staff check in with their supervisors at the gathering area. It is imperative that staff do not go back into the building until the “All Clear” signal has sounded. It is imperative that staff assist any person who is having physical difficulty leaving the building. Emergency Team Captains wear high visibility vests so you can see them in a crowd. Your safety is paramount to Buy More.

❚ Social Networking Skills

10. Message Strategies: Writing Positive Messages; Composition Modes: Summarizing L.O.❹

As energy costs trend ever upward and more people become attuned to the environmental and geopolitical complexities of petroleum-based energy, interest in solar, wind, and other alternative energy sources ­continues to grow. In locations with high insolation, a measure of cumulative sunlight, solar panels can be cost-effective solutions over the long term. However, the upfront costs are still daunting for most homeowners. To help lower the entry barrier, Grasshopper Solar in Ontario finances or sells solar panels to homeowners who then can benefit from the Ontario government’s “Feed-in-Tariff” (FIT) Program.10

Your Task Visit www.grasshoppersolar.com, click on Residential to read about their program. Next, study Grasshopper Solar’s presence on Facebook (www.­ facebook.com/grasshoppersolar) to get a feel for how the company presents itself in a social networking environment. Now assume that you have been assigned the task of writing a brief summary of the purchase or financing program that will appear on the Notes tab of Grasshopper Solar’s Facebook page. In your own w ­ ords, and in 200 words or less, write an introduction to their program options and email it to your instructor. ❚ Procedure Writing Skills

11. Message Strategies: Writing Procedures L.O.❹

You work at AMC Financial Services, a tax preparation firm with 150 employees. On the way to a human resources meeting this morning, the general manager took you aside to complain about some procedures that were not being followed. “You’ve got to let staff know in writing that maintaining confidentiality is crucial in this office,” she announced. You’re her assistant, but you had no idea what she was talking about so you asked, “What’s the problem?” “Well,” she said, “I just walked through the client services department, past two people’s desks when they were away getting coffee, and saw that they had left client files open in plain view for anyone to read. That just won’t do. Our clients’ financial information is in those files. Not only that—I checked to see if the files had been signed out in the log book and they hadn’t! As well, the staff with the files were not listed in the log book as having clearance to handle them in the first place. We have rules about this stuff.” You replied, “We have had a lot of turnover in the last few months, and with the tax season in full swing it may be that staff cut a few corners to get the work done in time.” “But the only person who can handle a client file is the representative assigned to it and who has taken the online training and been certified (and given a certification ID) by the human resources department. The ­certification ID has to be recorded in the log book each time the rep takes a file out of the central filing system. These are the basics and it is clear that staff need a refresher on these procedures. And hey, we never leave files lying around—they have to be locked in a file drawer if not in use by the trained rep. This is basic stuff.” You answered, “OK, I see your point. We have had a good informal system that has worked quite well, but given all the changes in staff we can’t rely on people knowing some of these procedures anymore, so you’re right, we need to provide some written procedures for handling files. I’ll send out an email later today ­documenting these procedures.”

[172 ] PAR T 3: B R IEF B US INE S S M E S S AGE S

Your Task Write an email message to staff documenting procedures for handling client files. Make up any specific details that you feel should be added to the procedures mentioned above. How can you use listing to make the procedures easy to read? How can you introduce the procedures so that staff will be receptive? ❚ Email Skills ❚ Portfolio Builder

12. Message Strategies: Using the Direct Approach; Compositional Modes: Comments & Critiques L.O.❸, Chapter 6

As the president of the local Minor Hockey Association, you lead an organization with hundreds of youth players, coaches, officials, and parents. You have to keep up with Hockey Canada policy changes, regulation changes, requirements for screening coaches and certifying officials, and controversies involving the sport. Just this morning, an item in the local newspaper got your attention. A prominent member of the hockey club—a very competitive ­parent—was quoted saying that the rules prohibiting body checking in Pee Wee Hockey (11- and 12-year-olds) were preventing the kids from learning the skills they would need in the next levels. He claimed that all the concerns about concussion and injury were “baloney” and that in the old days you would just call it “getting your bell rung” if you took a hit to the head. This kind of talk drives you crazy because you know that body checking in this age group causes many injuries and concussions. Lately, you read a couple of studies, one published by the Canadian Medical Association and the other in the Journal of the

American Medical ­Association. That study, based on 2451 Pee Wee players in Alberta, where the checking was allowed, and in Quebec, where it was not, concluded that the injury rate was three times higher when body checking was permitted. You also know some players who were concussed and have been asked to play again right away rather than take the appropriate time for healing and many who have suffered long-term effects from head injuries. You think many parents, coaches, and players should learn more about concussions. Your Task Write a news release (no more than 300

words) that can be posted on your Minor Hockey ­Association’s Facebook page. Correct the impressions that concussions are not serious and that children as young as 11 and 12 should be learning to body check. If this topic interests you, look up additional facts about concussion rates in youth hockey or soccer, or another sport you are interested in.11 ❚ Media Skills ❚ Social Networking Skills

13. Message Strategies: Writing a News Release L.O.❹, Chapter 6

Assume you are promoting the community fair described in Chapter 6, Case #3, on page 145. Write a news release to post on your group’s website to let the public know about the event and encourage them to attend. Make up any details you need and include a photo or a short video clip. If your group had the budget to make the news release a social media release, what features would you add?

Bu s i ness Co mmu ni ca tion N o teb ook

Intercultural Communication How Direct Is Too Direct? Is it possible to be too direct, even if you’re simply requesting information? At an event in Mexico, the president of the United States spoke bluntly of political realities, but the president of France spoke more abstractly—his style more grand, his words more beautiful. One man addressed the issues directly; the other was less direct. Which one had greater impact? Neither speech changed global relationships, but the American president was seen as a product of his outspoken culture, whereas the French president was seen as at least making his listeners feel better for a

while. Countries such as France, Mexico, Japan, Saudi Arabia, Italy, and the Philippines all tend toward highcontext cultures (see discussion in Chapter 1). That is, people in those countries depend on shared knowledge and inferred messages to communicate; they gather meaning more from context and less from direct statement. On a continuum of high- to low-context cultures, ­Canada falls between France, Britain, and the United States, having been influenced by our English and French heritage and by our proximity to the United States. So, although people in the United States believe that being direct is civil, considerate, and honest, people in high-context cultures and mid-context cultures

c h a pter 7: W r i ti n g R o u ti n e a n d Po s i t i ve M essa g es [ 173]

sometimes view that same directness as abrupt, rude, and ­intrusive. In high-context cultures, don’t say outright, “You are wrong.” People know when they’ve made a mistake, but if you put it into words in highcontext cultures, you cause them to lose face. To determine whether your international audience will appreciate a direct or an implied message, consider your audience’s attitudes toward four factors: destiny, time, authority, and logic.

• Destiny. Do people in this culture believe they can control events themselves? Or are events seen as predetermined and uncontrollable? If you’re supervising employees who believe that a construction deadline is controlled by fate, they may not understand your crisp requests to stay on schedule. • Time. Do people in this culture believe that time is exact, precise, and not to be wasted? Or do they view time as relative, relaxed, and necessary for developing interpersonal relationships? If you believe that time is money and you try to get straight to business with your Japanese manager, he may overlook your message because of your lack of relationship skills and disregard for social propriety. • Authority. Do the people in this culture conduct business more autocratically or more democratically? In Mexico, rank and status are highly valued, so when communicating with people who have less authority than you do, you may need to be even more direct than you’re used to being in Canada. And when communicating with people who have more authority than you do, you may need to be much less direct than you’re used to being in C ­ anada.

• Logic. Do the people in this culture pursue logic in a straight line from point A to point B? Or do they communicate in circular or spiral patterns of logic? You may need to ask not only how direct to be in written messages but also whether to write at all; perhaps a phone call or a visit would be more appropriate. By finding out how much or how little a culture tends toward high-context communication, you can decide whether to be direct or to rely on nuance.

Applications for Success For more information on the subject of intercultural communication, go to www.executiveplanet.com. 1. Research a high-context culture such as Japan, Korea, or China, and write a one- or two-paragraph summary of how someone in that culture would go about requesting information. 2. Germany is a low-context culture; by comparison, France and England are more high context. These three translations of the same message were posted on a lawn in Switzerland: a. German: “Walking on the grass is forbidden.” b. English: “Please do not walk on the grass.” c. French: “Those who respect their environment

will avoid walking on the grass.” How does the language of each sign reflect the way information is conveyed in the cultural context of each nation? Write a brief (two- to three-paragraph) explanation.

What approach should be used for routine replies and positive messages?

The direct approach works well for routine replies and positive messages because recipients will generally be interested in what you have to say. Place your main idea (the positive reply or the good news) in the opening.

What are the goals of routine and positive messages?

When you are responding positively to a request, sending routine announcements, or sending a positive or goodwill message, you have several goals:  communicate the information or the good news,  answer all questions,  provide all required details, and  leave your reader with a good impression of you and your firm.

What are the important guidelines to follow in writing routine replies?

Elements of a Routine Request use a bulleted list for multiple requests or questions. give a reason for the request or state its benefit after you've made your request. omit unnecessary details. close in a courteous and efficient way.

What are the three step strategy for sending routine replies and positive messages?

Apply the three-step process to routine and positive messages..
Step 1: Planning a routine or positive message..
Step 2: Writing a routine or positive message..
Step 3: Completing a routine or positive message..